lost again
This is a year of lost.
Lets see, firstly , i lost my digital camera at dempsey, secondly, i lost my handphone at ikea, then i almost lost my black ring that i got from taiwan..hmm, maybe i've also lost my first serious girlfriend? haha... bad joke. Loosing everything.. i dunno wad next. Hope i dun loose my shop.
Anywayz, the renos are almost done... It's been a very tiring week of knocking furniture together, fixing the electrical outlets and wirings, sawing, cutting, sanding, varnishing, and painting. Aside from that i've been also thinking of the business operations, and other logistical crap. Well, thanks to alywin and nicky, they helped painting the exterior of the wall.. but no thanks to nicky.. he nicely left a corner fer me to fill haha... kidding... And not forgetting selwyn's white wall.. too bad there werent enuff white paint, or i'll get you to paint other things. Adrian and Diana fer varnishing the first coat of my wooden platform. It's really nice having the guys around, be it fer helping out, or just being there to talk or have a smoke. Most of the days i find myself all alone in the shop, doing my own thing, wondering if wad i'm doing is the right thing to do. I must admit that it was a very rash decision, and a very not-well-thought of thing to do, but maybe i was in a frusted mind and had to do it. Sometimes i dun even have thw answers to why i'm doing it. I just hope it'll work. Well, if it doesn't, then i'll just dump the idea and go do something else.
Everyone says this phrase 'Life's short'. Yet the many things we do in our lives are always so senseless, mindless, and stupid. Making our life pretty 'not worth-while'. Or .. worthless. Sometimes i want to do everything that it has to offer. As it is i'll always want to experience the things that i've never experience yet.. Like go to uni overseas, assist for a photographer overseas, shoot fer some kickass magazine, travel, hike, backpack, or even things like set up a little store to sell my photos in postcard size, etc etc. so many fucking things to do. Even sometimes, i look back, and wonder things like how it would be if i was in JC.. or if i went for that course that was open in secondary school. So many things to do.
At the end of my life i absolutely dun wan to look back and see tat the things ive done was totally not worth it. Guess it's that stupid thing we read in write comm that counts now no?... about the process of getting there, and not the status eventually.?
Just had a really good nite at adrians place last nite. swam, a little bit of tennis, and a really good bbq. Nicky and I made one of the best.. or should i say, the bestest fire in all my bbqs put together... right bro? had a lot to eat, drink and smoke.. Chess was really gooooood. It was a great challenge i must say, teaming up with alywin against norman and johan.. who were so damn sure that they'll win half-way thru. but guess who fucked themselves with that move to check us with that bishop? hey aly,.. great game no Sir?
Mahjong was fun, but as usual, i dun really know how to play, so.. busted myself some turns. bah.. didn't lose much money tho.. 2 bucks?
Ivan was talking about this girl that he's met and going out fer a date.,.,.. etc. Nicky was talking about Aska, and all of us were all asking him stuffs. Someone said "isn't is nice to know that your friends are supportive and interested in your girl???"..... I kept quiet not knowing wad to say. It felt like a slap in the face, a really tight slap - one of those that'll leave you totally speechless and defeated. And that was precisely the lousy feeling i've had fer god knows how long. I've been going out with mel, and it always have been just me an her,.. sometimes, johan.. or aly. But never had i introed her into the group. Fer obvious reasons like some of them have something against her. Sometimes it really hurts. esp when there's something happening at..say walas, I ask," izzit ok if i bring mel along?" and one of them will tell me 'diana's there, what do you think?' .. duh.
I'm dying to bring her out with everyone. but i know that it's now a good idea. When is? Aska's been here, soon ivan's chick. hell even shiyan has had a drink with us. fuck. where's the support and the friends when i need them?.... oh well. i guess everyone has their own agenda, and sometimes no matter how right i think things are, there're always some that'll think otherwise. fuck 'em.
Which brings me to my next point, i'm thinking of organising a little dinner... before i start my shop in feb, and just to experiment if anyone actually reads my shit.... which of you guys say a big "AY" ?.. say dinner somewhere end of this week?
| louis at 14:30friends
alywin
diana
charmaine
norman
ivan
sahila
mimosa
nicky
sharon
val
gracia
Jenn
sel
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2005.
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4 Comments:
I'm leaving for manchester on 28 Jan so can only make it before, or after 2 Feb. Whether I make it or not, bring mel.
AY~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don't forget to bring the other girl from you darkroom too... the one in the sink. I'll bring the one on my shoulder. =)
I guess I should be apologising... Firstly, for the incomplete wall and secondly, maybe for not being that good a friend as you have been to me when I was down in the pits with Alvina. No excuses or rants about how busy I am with work.
Just a plan case stating my apology and me telling you that I got your back in whatever you do. Just go forth and seek happy nights.
Like I just blogged "If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid." said a Greek philiosopher... Apply that to your heart and work I guess and only occasionally look back for regrets just to learn from them.
Other then that... I totally cool with Melissa if you wanna bring her out with us. People may be entitled to views and the whole world may call you two fools but who cares when you're in love.
Go forth and seek happy nights...
AY~!!!!
Don't forget to bring the other girl from you darkroom too... the one in the sink. I'll bring the one on my shoulder. =)
I guess I should be apologising... Firstly, for the incomplete wall and secondly, maybe for not being that good a friend as you have been to me when I was down in the pits with Alvina. No excuses or rants about how busy I am with work.
Just a plan case stating my apology and me telling you that I got your back in whatever you do. Just go forth and seek happy nights.
Like I just blogged "If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid." said a Greek philiosopher... Apply that to your heart and work I guess and only occasionally look back for regrets just to learn from them.
Other then that... I totally cool with Melissa if you wanna bring her out with us. People may be entitled to views and the whole world may call you two fools but who cares when you're in love.
Go forth and seek happy nights...
Nicky
P.s. I hope this message doesn't appear twice!
AY!!!
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